I told my Pastor, Lester Brown, I would shout him out in this blog post. Lol. But this came out of conversation with him as we talked about the truth about love. You already know that this girl here, is not about sugar coating love. When we talked about “love unplugged” what we were referencing was the good, the bad, and the ugly that love ultimately entails.
I wrote something on Instagram a while back in reference to this:
The secret is there are no fairytales. Just two people whose worlds collide. Whose will to make it in life together overcomes their will to be right, to be in control, or to be prideful. The secret is fairytales come wrapped in hard work and realistic expectations.
So when I think of love unplugged, I think of exploring love disconnected from what you’ve seen on TV, from the example your parents provided, and disconnected from the idea that it will be a fairytale. I am sure there is someone out there that feels their love is a fairytale but I haven’t met them yet, so I am going to go with it. We have to be able to define love with our partner and through the example that God has set for us.
And yes it’s really hard to do. But at the end of the day, it’s essential to having a healthy relationship. When we have so many outside sources as our standard, we are setting ourselves up for a more challenging course. Having expectations, wants and needs are all great, but I know that plenty of us have overlooked what could have been amazing love because we were looking for a fairytale and not reality.
In that same conversation, we referenced Lauryn Hill’s unplugged album. Yes at first listen, everyone complained about the cracking in her voice. But then you listened again and really felt the pain in each note. You then began to see the beauty in what it was she was presenting and it was the real thing. She was laying it all out on the table. She was vulnerable. And that my friends, is what often happens in love. We have to allow ourselves to be vulnerable, to feel, and allow another person to be witness to that. It may not always be pretty, but that is love and that’s how you know someone is really in it when they can love you, cracking voice, cranky days, and crusted eyes in the morning.
Love unplugged is taking away everything, stripping it down, and getting to the real root of it. Can you choose to love this person when the neon lights aren’t flashing, when they’re trying to pick themselves up, when they are being refined by God? And if you can’t then, you are imitating some form of love, but you are not in the real thing.
Agape love is love unplugged. It’s our imitation of God’s love for us and it’s possible. I hear so many people tell me what they can’t do completely ignoring the fact that with God ALL things are possible. We can learn to love unconditionally, not just our children which often people are more open to, but our friends, our family, and our significant others. Take the plug out, see the beauty in the acoustic, stripped down version of love and you will be able to appreciate the beauty of the full set later.
What does love unplugged mean for you? Tell me about it in the comments!