The importance of saying no has been a recurring topic of conversation in many circles. Exercising our right to say no is without a doubt one of the highest forms of self-care. But on the other end of that, you have someone like Shonda Rhimes who wrote an amazing book called “Year of Yes,” where seemingly everything changed the moment she decided to stop saying no to everything. So where exactly should our efforts lie? Well, I believe it’s all about learning how to evaluate your yes.
I was urged to query agents before publishing my first book myself. I didn’t think it was possible, but when you talk to someone you respect and they think it’s possible, you follow suit. I researched agents of some of the books I thought were in the same vein. I read the submission guidelines to see how they varied from company to company. I wrote the proposal and fired a few off in hopes that I might hear something and one day be led to that shiny publishing deal so many of us as writers dream of.
I remember seeing engagement rings up and down my timeline before my husband proposed. I would text my best friend with snippy comments about how it had to stop and she would tell me about the 5 other engagements that popped up on her timeline as well. We’d both been in long-term relationships, hers longer than mine, with men who definitely expressed that they wanted to get married. So clearly they were waiting for the right things. Clearly starting with the cash that it takes to buy a ring.
Depending on the day of the week, you may get varying opinions on whether social media is in fact, real. Often referred to as a highlight reel, it can seem that there is a lack of the full picture when it comes to the totality of what life truly encompasses. Which we all know is both the up, down, and in between. But no matter where you stand on that particular thought, the reality is that social media has the ability to lead to some very real life opportunities.
In 2008, when I first created a blogspot and began writing about the chronicles of the music industry, it was somewhat at the beginning of the blogging boom. Give or take, because many of the most popular bloggers today started a few years before. I wasn’t serious about it at all. My real, “I’m taking it serious” year was in 2013.
Is your work aligning to your goals? This is an important question that I believe we have to ask ourselves this year as we approach the third quarter. 2016 brought an onslaught of infopreneurship. But the reality is, we have been in an information age for quite some time. We went from agricultural to industrial to informational. But it was like the last two years, bloggers figured that out and went HAM-burgular. And it was great in a lot of ways, but I think that it left a lot of people confused about what their goals actually were.
“I am an amazing person.” It was one of the most striking things that author, app-developer and entrepreneur Vaughn Dabney said to me during our conversation. It was assured, confident, and rolled off the tongue. Not in any way arrogant, but inspiring for someone that so often is her own worst critic. I wanted to repeat it. I wanted to remind myself. Filled with many more gems during our talk, I appreciated his candidness, his sense of adventure, and his simple yet targeted approach to releasing his first book, “Finding One.”