I’m not sure how much more redundant we can be about the importance of communication in relationships. But somehow it seems like we still haven’t gotten the message. What is it about being able to accurately express yourself to another person that leaves us failing miserably?
Would the excellent communicators please stand up? Some of us like myself need to study you. Somewhere along the way I’ve learned that I excel in communicating in writing and not so much when it comes to speaking with my significant other. But the older I get, the more important it has been for me to enhance my communication skills. It’s honestly the only way a relationship can survive.
So where do I fail at communicating? Let me count the ways. Lol. No I am not that bad but I have noticed a few things about myself that could use work. I have a tendency to shut down if I think what I have to express could possibly be irrational. The fact of the matter is, we all have irrational feelings sometimes. But the only way to get through them is to express that to the other person. Keeping it all in really just builds resentment and can be catastrophic long term.
I also don’t have a great medium when it comes to communicating. I either know how to be really nice about something that’s bothering me or not so nice about it. You have to be able to speak the truth in love. You can still be kind without putting your feelings on the back burner. For me it’s been all about learning the balance.
One thing is for sure, when I finally do articulate properly what’s in my head, I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. It always clears the air and my partner in crime, most often understands where I’m coming from. Sometimes it takes a few rounds of explanation but nonetheless, we come to an understanding.
You feel it, say it. You want to fix something, do it. You miss them, tell them. It has to be as simple as that! I beg of you, just know that you will truly have a hard time succeeding in a relationship without enough trust to tell someone how you feel. You should be with someone who welcomes your thoughts and your feelings and who won’t judge you because of them but will do all they can to help rectify those feelings.
Happy Communicating! And if you have some tips, feel free to share!